Why

You know we moan and moan about things being wrong with our lives every day but we dont realise that theres so many things bigger and more important than our stupid little worries. I dont know how im feeling right now. I just dont feel like talking to anybody, dont feel like doing anything, its like im in this strange sort of existence that i cant explain. Have you ever just sat on a bench in the middle of a busy heaving street and detached yourself from reality? I have. I recommend it. Its such a surreal emotion to just be there, in the midst of all the chaos, and yet nobody notices you. Theres something sad in life that we walk past thousands of new people every week yet we never even throw a glance at some of them. They could be our future husbands, future stars, future idols. But yet when a few years down the line they're walking down the red carpet, we will never have known that we have seen them before pottering around in their day to day lives. Likewise, that little old man you walked by the other day? You dont know when hell die. Someone walks into your life briefly and then disappears, with barely even a hint of a chance that theyll come back. Like a whisper lost on the wind. "Ive been alone when surrounded by friends. How could the silence be so loud?"
Im not as good at this pouring out my emotions thing as some people, but there are so many thoughts running around my mind that I dont feel I can write them all in this mere space - theres no space big enough in the world to accommodate them. Every time I feel everythings going right, something comes along and whacks me right back to where I started.
And im so frustrated with myself because I know I have a good life, I know i cant complain. But when its something like this I dont know how to cope.
ohhhhhhhhhhhh goddddd. this still hasnt got rid of them